Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Week 3, Communication across cultures
Give an example from your own life, either personal or professional, where you interacted with someone from another culture. Was the interaction effective, i.e. did the message result in appropriate action or response? If no, how could the communication have been improved? If yes, what made the communication work?
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Last weekend we had our family reunion and there was a couple from Italy that had come. They do know some English so when the young lady had to ask if anyone had clothes she could wear because her suitcase got lost I was about the same size as her so I started talking to her. It was a little hard to understand her and I think she knew that but by carefully listening to her and putting words together I knew what she was saying. I think it also helps to speak slow and ask questions if you don't exactly know what another cultures are saying or mean.
ReplyDeleteWell this is great!
ReplyDeleteMy boyfriend is from Asia. We talk almost every single day over the internet, and it has been amazing to learn of the differences in our cultures. For example, where he lives, they hardly ever use the phrase ‘good morning’ when greeting each other!
I’ve learned about their education system, financial system, job markets, weather…etc.
There have been times when we’ve been trying to communicate something, but got confused in the process. He knows English very well, but it still isn’t his first language, and there have been times when it’s been difficult for him to find the right word to use while talking with me. But as long as we strive to be direct and clear…it really isn’t an issue.
There WAS one time though, when we had a miscommunication. After we got through it, it was funny, but before that, it was very annoying and confusing. It had to do with the way he had structured a sentence, and the punctuation he had used. Anyway, we quickly got that straight, but I think that it was the transitioning of a phrase from his language to English….things just got jumbled a bit.
I really think that we’ve done well, considering our differences. I just need to keep in mind that those differences DO exist, and to keep an open and clear mind.
A few years ago my husband and I owned commercial rental property in Minneapolis. Part of this property housed a large ballroom from the early 1900s. We decided to start renting the space out on weekends for private parties such as weddings, birthdays, etc. It was a great space because it also had a kitchen attached that could be used by the renters.
ReplyDeleteSoon we were turning people away because all our weekends were booked. The business took off with the Hispanic community. It's popularity was due to the kitchen that could be used. These folks could make their own food to save money but more important it was the type of food their culture liked and not the typical banquet style food.
This was the first time I had close contact with the Hispanic culture and commuunication was very challenging. The adults rarely learned English when they moved to America. So I needed to do all my communicating through the children in most cases. The young people were well educated and bi-lingual so it was helpful for the parents. The only problem was sometimes the children were as young as 4 or 5! I always managed somehow and a genuine smile goes a long way in communication.
I certainly wished I had learned another language when I was younger. With our society now filled with many cultures it would be so helpful.
Last July I was introduced to a gentleman from Jamaica. Over the last 6 months, we have become good friends. We have similar interests and enjoy each other’s company. The one thing that I have noticed lately is that we definitely come from different cultures. During many of our conversations, I will become frustrated because of the miscommunication. One thing that I try to accomplish during conversation with someone is that we are “on the same page” which I believe can be done with effective communication between the two people. However, some of the barriers that we are experiencing are due to the different cultures and ethnic backgrounds. Some of the words we choose to use and how we use them have different meanings. This causes the message to be interpreted in a way that differs from the sender’s idea, which is where the frustration comes in. I appreciate the material that we are learning in class at this time. Not only am I learning how to prepare for a medical profession in this diverse world, it has also helped me grow in my personal life as well. The book we are learning from in class will remain in my study as a reference guide for years to come.
ReplyDeleteMy father remarried a woman who is from Brazil. She lives her with her 2 children. When they first moved to the states it was very difficult to communicate with them. The children had taken some english classes in schoool, but my step-mother knew very little. A lot of the time we would end up using a computer program to translate our words so we could both understand each other. One thing that made the translating difficult was the words that translated so literally and meant something different to her or to me than what the other is trying to say. The easiest way for us to communicate was to use gestures, and signs. I do wish I had learned some spanish in school as that would have made it a lot easier to understand a lot of the words she used.
ReplyDeleteWell if I remember correctly a difference in culture doesn’t necessarily mean a difference in language or location. The best example I can come up with would be using my boyfriend and his family as an example. I don’t come from what you would call a traditional family setting. To explain about my family I would have to say that my mother doesn’t know how to cook and our stove is where we set the mail. In fact we rarely go grocery shopping and on Holidays we get our food pre-cooked or others bring the dishes. To get to my point, when I was first dating this guy and I met his family over Easter one year I was shocked to find that they played games, everyone cooked and the television was off. It is funny to me because as I have gotten older I have realized that my life isn’t the “norm”. It isn’t exactly a different culture but it did cause many communication issues, I didn’t know what I was suppose to do or say and was frequently stared at. I had to explain to them a bit about my life at home before they understood that family time and holidays meant something different to me than them. In the end they were extremely understanding and thought my life was just as intriguing as I thought theirs was.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was in high school we had a spanish room that was also used to teach english to the new students from Mexico. So, having taken spanish classes two years in that room I did a lot of interacting with others who had limited english. It was always a little difficult to understand because the accents were strong and the english was not good. I always had appropriate responses though because if something was misunderstood the teacher was in the room to make clear of the situation.
ReplyDeleteMy wife and I came from Thailand to Eau Claire, WI twenty years ago; a Catholic Charity Church found an occasion family to sponsor my family to Eau Claire. When I arrived in Eau Claire, I did not speak much English, but this Caucasian family spent a lot of time teaching me English and other survival skills. I was glad to have his family as my sponsor and guide me for several years. He and his wife have taught me a lot of good things and the life in this America. At that time, I did not know any thing about American culture and I thought American culture would be the same as Hmong, but it was not the same. One weekend, he and his wife invited me and my wife to dinner with his family. We went there for dinner with his family. When we were there, I saw his wife was cooking in the kitchen, I thought to myself that she was cooking food like Hmong food. At dinner time, everyone sat at the table and his wife began passing around toasted bread with peanut butter; couple slices cheese, smoke beef, some crackers, and fruit drink to us. I asked him, “Do you eat rice in your family?” And he said that his family did not eat any rice. Also there was not much food on the table either and I thought to myself that the food would not be enough for everyone to eat, but we got by with the food his wife prepared. I want to let everyone know that in the Hmong family, rice was the main food. We served rice with other food three times per day. We did not eat much bread, cracker, and cheese in the Hmong family. Remember, we were different believe in culture and we might eat different meat in our family. For example, we used difference body language or gesture can mean different thing to other culture. I do think that we’ve done well and considering our differences. We need to keep in mind that those differences do exist and keep our self open all the time to accept others.
ReplyDeleteHello,
ReplyDeleteMy sister's companion is from Pakistan. He is a surgeon and they live in Arizona. They were home about a month ago for my mom's funeral. He has been in the states for about twenty years. We were relaxing by the fire in the backyard with a group and having a good time. We were talking about childhood memories and some were getting embarrassing about me. I would say "get out of here" or "shut uuuuup". But I didn't mean it literally. Later on Rajit told my sister that I was rude. She aksed him what he meant by that. He told her. She had a good laugh. I apoligized and said that's just the way I express myself and did not mean to be rude at all. I stopped saying things like that for the next few days. I can see how people can find saying "shut up" offensive. We need to choose our words more carfully aroung people who may take the meaning the wrong way.
When I was in my sophmore year of high school we decided to get a foreign exchange student. I as so excited to get that experience, but didn't have the communication skills or the knowledge to make it work. Our foreign exchange student was from South Korea. When she was living with us we did so many things to offend her without even knowing it or even trying to. We had a cat that she was scared to death of, not knowing that it meant death in Korea we got very frustrated with her. Also her not being able to speak very good English made it very difficult. We didn't take the time to slow down when speaking to her so it was very hard for her to understan us. During that time it would have been very helpful to have taken a class for communicating with people from a different culture. It also would have been helpful to have just known a little about her culture. Being clueless on these things made the experience horrible for all of us. Now knowing more about communicating with different cultures it should help me in my future if I ever expierence anything like it again.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was growing up, I was in many different foster homes and while living with different families, I encountered many cultures. One family that stood out was my last foster home. They were from Nigeria and ate foods that were different from what I considered “normal”. One morning I woke up and I smelled something that, in my opinion, smelled very badly. I ran up stairs and asked them what that AWFUL smell was! They had an angry look in their face, and I had no idea why. It turns out that one of the animals that they had been raising was killed and they were now cooking part of that animal. It was a very traditional thing for them to do in their culture. They were very self sufficient. I don’t think that I communicated very effectively in this situation because I meant no insult in saying that it smelt awful, I just was stating what I thought. In their culture, that was extremely rude (and in some American households that would be considered rude as well, I was just not brought up to keep my thoughts to myself…which isn’t always appropriate and can land some people in some tough spots). Next time I encounter something that is not a “norm” in our culture, I will think twice about saying the first thing that comes to my mind, I will stop and think about the repercussions of what I am saying can be.
ReplyDeleteMy in counter with someone from another culture was very intense and scary.
ReplyDeleteA couple of years ago a couple came into the store, I could tell they needed time to browse so I allowed them to do so. After a short period of time had passed, I approached the couple and introduced myself and asked if I could help them find something. The husband said no, the wife smiled.
Keep in mind, I am not familar with this culture,so I continued to talk to the wife and let the husband shop.
After a period of time had passed, the husband found something that he was interested in, which happened to be on the wrong fixture.This was a very expensive item and I tried to explain to the customer that it was there by mistake. He wanted this item for 50 percent off, which I was going to have to do anyway but he did not know that. So what I thought was a joke,after he ranted so loudly and continuosly, I said to the wife, "let me give this to him before he has a heart attack."
I was told in no uncertain terms that, that was no way to treat a paying customer, if that was how he was going to be treated he would never shop at this store again.
I tried repeatedly, to save this relationship, but I was told first of all I was not to speak to the wife,and then to tell her that her husband was going to have a heart attack was absurd.
Needless to say, I lose a sale and a possible regular customer.
What I learned from this experiance, do not assume you can joke with everyone as you would with people that are within your culture. What you may think is harmless can be very harmful to someone of another culture.
About 15 years ago my uncle brought a woman here from Lithuania with all intentions of marrying here, which he did. She was/is an amazing woman, and we had read her letters ahead of time. She had said she was fluent, if I remember right in five languages, English being one, but knew eight. We took this as she was a very very smart woman, which was correct. My family welcomed her with open arms. I remember them coming to my youngest daughters birthday party shortly after she had arrived in the United States, keep in mind that my husbands side of the family does birthday parties big, and she was absolutely appalled at the amount of food we had. Being from such a poor country, they value every ounce of food and only cook just what is needed for each meal. I tried to explain to her that we save the food and reheat it, and that we always send home extras with guests also, my uncle being one of them, as he was a bachelor and not one to turn away a good home cooked meal. This seemed to make her feel better. The explanation was harder than I thought though, as I had read the letters with my uncle and understanding she was “fluent” in English, I thought I could just talk and she would understand. This was not the case, she knew the words but not always the correct meanings. With hand gestures and the packaging of the food we got this valuable point across to her. I wanted her to understand that even though we had a lot of food there, we certainly were not going to waste it either. She is still in our family, and is a very smart woman, she holds many jobs including working for the embassies when foreign travelers come to the United States. Sometimes it just takes patience and time and making sure that the words that are being said are the ones that are being comprehended.
ReplyDeleteWell back in high school I had several classes with a Hmong kid named Kong. He was always cool to talk to because he was laid back and had a good personality, despite not having the best English. I talked to him on a regular basis in the classes I had with him and ended up learning a great deal about the hmong culture, about growing up in it, and almost using a hybrid mix of american culture and the hmong culture. I also learned a great deal about why they do certain things the way they do, and also gained a higher respect for them. I believe the communication worked between us because we are both relatively laid back, thus not getting offended easily when one of us would make a mistake communicating.
ReplyDeleteI can remember many trips that my family and I have gone on, but the most memorable was the one to Cancun, Mexico. When you are in another country you want to be respectful of their customs and culture. I had never expected it to be so easy to feel that I fit into a culture, and then I realized that they were accommodating us. They had their own customs and culture but also made us feel as comfortable as possible. It was nice to see how respectful they were of all other cultures. I was impressed with the amount of hospitality that was shown to us. They would use Spanish when they spoke to other Spanish speaking individuals, but also knew English to accommodate the English speaking individuals. I knew a little bit of Spanish and tried to use it when I could and it seemed to please them that I was trying to fit in with their culture. I think, thanks to knowing a little bit of Spanish and the outstanding accommodations from the citizen’s, that the communication was very effective and helpful.
ReplyDeleteLast May, I went with my boyfriend and another couple to Jamaica for a vacation. That was the first time I had ever left the states and it was an experience I will never forget. While we were there we decided that we were going to go see where Bob Marley was raised and buried. Our cab driver asked us if we really wanted to get to know the Jamaican culture and we did, so he said he would take us through the cultural roots of Jamaica to Bob Marley’s house. We drove about an hour and a half up a mountain through little villages where we were definitely the minorities. During the drive, our cab driver would tell us different stories and show us different things that helped us learn more about their culture. It was really difficult for me to grasp the way that they speak, although it is English, the accent really threw me off and I had to really pay attention to figure out what he was saying. Frequently I would find myself asking my boyfriend “huh, what did he say?” By the end of the trip I had caught on to the accent pretty good just in time to go back home.
ReplyDeleteI work in a restaurant in Mondovi. Every so often we have people come through that are from all over. I had a couple come in that was from Germany. They were a little old couple that had lived here for a long time and were really good friends with my great aunt before she passed away. They would come in to eat and have pie. Even though they had been in the United States for as long as I can remember they still had the really heavy German accent. At times the gentleman was hard to understand. The accent got in the way so I would have to ask him to repeat what he was saying. By listening hard and with the help of his wife I could understand him, but it was difficult sometimes. He knew that I had a hard time once in a while and he would make jokes about it. They were a lot of fun. I took German in school so I knew a few words, but he mostly spoke English unless he was talking to his wife. Listening carefully and piecing words together isn’t always so easy.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I was born in the U.S., I was raised in a traditional Hmong family and many of my parent’s beliefs were put onto me. Growing up, my father taught me to never question a person with authority. I was also warned that making eye contact with another person is rude, challenging, and a sign of disrespect; especially towards a person with authority. When I was attending elementary school, many of my teachers scolded me for not paying attention. They often told me to look at their eyes, which I was reluctant to do. They didn’t understand that I was listening but just avoiding eye contact to be respectful. I didn’t understand why my teachers wanted eye contact nor did I understand why they thought I wasn’t listening. Communication would have been greatly improved if my teachers would just ask questions. It wasn’t until later in middle school, when I joined team sports, did I realize that eye contact shows you are interested and paying attention. Even now, I sometimes have a hard time making eye contact with others.
ReplyDeleteAnother story from the cleaning company I used to work for. I was the supervisior for the company in this area and was in charge of training in the new employees. My one of my first trainees was a deaf man from Romania. He knew English sign language and he could read lips so communicating was not a big problem. Also, there was a woman with us who translated for us for the first three days, so that was helpful. Everything went well until I realized that Romania must be a male dominated culture because he REALLY did not like having a woman as his boss. He also did not like having to depend on a woman (his translator) to explain to him what he needed to do, it made him feel like he was stupid. So, two cleaned buildings later, and two hissy fits, I tried to explain to him that he was doing a great job. That I needed the translator to make sure that he knew exactly what he was doing, and what was expected of him. Also, I explained that I did not want him to take his training or my position personally because none of it was intended to belittle him or make him feel bad. I also explained to him that I had never worked with a deaf person before and I ask him a lot of questions to make sure that I have explained myself clearly. He said that he understood and everything was okay and we went on with our day. Later on, as gently as possible, I had to correct him on his work. I knew doing this was going to be like walking on egg shells. At the same time, if I just let it go or correct it myself, it will become a bad habit. Even in the most gentle delivery, this man just lost it. He was absolutely offended that I pointed out the fact that he was wrong or did something wrong. He stormed off of the job, in a violent manner I might add, only to beg for his job back the next day. So, response did not work out as well as I had hoped and I really did not mean to hurt his feelings or offend him. I am not sure what I could have done differently to not upset him. At the same time, I was expected to get a job done within a time frame just as we North Americans usually do. Perhaps, if this man would have understood our culture, instead of us forming around him, this may have turned out differently.
ReplyDeleteI receive my satellite service through Dish Network. A while back, there was an incident with two of my remote controls. One didn’t work and the other controlled both TVs. Consequently, we weren’t able to watch separate shows. I called Dish Network’s tech support team and was helped by an individual who had an accent. His English was good but he had such a strong accent that made it difficult for me to understand him. As a result, we had a hard time trying to resolve the issue. A few minutes into the call, I decided to put him on speaker so I can hear him better. I also took a little more time to comprehend what he was saying to me, and rephrased back to him what he had said to make sure I heard him correctly. Finally, after a matter of about 15 minutes, we were able to fix my remotes and got them working properly. Because of this incident, I’ve learned to be more intuitive towards individuals with English as a second language.
ReplyDeleteWhen I first met a the boyfriend, (now husband) of my best girlfriend, who is from Mexico we suggested that we eat at Chi-Chi resturant. I noticed this look on his face that I thought was strange. His english wasn't at our level,but my spanish was nonexistance. So I thought he didn't understand me so I asked my friend to translate to Vicente. She did and then started to laugh and have a conversation with much gesturing and looks back at me. I started to feel uncomfortable when she cameback and explained that in spanish Vicente Chi-Chi is slang for breasts and he thought I was asking him if he wanted to go to a titty bar. We all still laugh about this when we get together, though it's been ten years.
ReplyDeleteThis is really an interesting subject-I have so many experiences to share. One experience that I would like to blog about is my vacation to Jamaica. The travel agency I worked with was showing me all these beautiful resorts to choose from. I was so excited for a beautiful romantic getaway. I had heard stories from other friends who had visited there about the different resorts and things to do. However, I was in complete shock when I got off the plane and a Jamaican gentleman approached me and asked me if I smoked. I smiled and offered him a cigarette (thinking he was looking to bum one). Needless to say he was talking about marijuana and not cigarettes. As we were on our Sandals bus to our resort it was different to see the poorly made, narrow roads plus they drove on the other side from us. While driving along I saw dogs running wild, adults and children bathing in rivers and streams, garbage all over, and their homes were made from pieces of tin. I took all this in on my way to my resort and guess I couldnt believe from all the beautiful pictures of the resorts that they actually lived that way. Once at the resort, it was just as beautiful as the pictures. At the resort I ran into a few other situations such as groundskeepers coming up to my patio asking me if I wanted ganja and the Jamaican people trying to barter their goods for my name brand clothes and perfume/cologne. I would travel to Jamaica again however,it opened my eyes to a whole new culture.
ReplyDeleteI speak with at least one person where English is not the primary language every day. Usually if I slow down and speak clearly, the other person will slow down and we can understand each other very well. If I am at work I do have access to a language line that allows me to call for an Interpreter for any language that I need. I enjoy talking with people and learning from them. In my spare time I would volunteer at the Literacy of Chippewa Valley, and would work with adults to read and write English as their second language.
ReplyDeleteIn my senior year of high school we had a student move to my hometown (Anoka, Minnesota) from Atlanta. Our coach had told us that we were going to be getting a new guy on the team. Not many people from down south move to Anoka so we were all anxious. However, he had told us that he had already spoken with the player and his parents over the phone and they were worried that he might not get along with some of the players or coaches. After that statement my coach asked why they thought that. Little did we know but they were from a part of Atlanta where blacks and whites don’t get along. Our coach explained this too us but we knew there wasn’t going to be a problem because we already have a few black players on the team (who were some of our best players) and we were probably the most loving bunch of guys around. So they day that he came I could tell he was a little weary of how to interact with everyone. He mostly hung out with the other black players on the team for the first few days of two-a-days practice. As a captain I wanted him to see it is different in Minnesota and that nobody was judging him. Because everyone was so excepting of him he became part of the team very quickly and I could see how we changed his outlook on blacks and whites and showed him we really are no different than each other and that we are all people. I’m glad all of this happened because he is still one of my best friends I ever made in high school.
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